I haven't felt like myself in months. As I've allowed myself to dig a little deeper (and be more specific), I noticed that I 've completely stopped writing my blogs.
How can you have your blog called "Make Your Heart Smile?" when you haven't been smiling. Although this wasn't a conscious thought, I know my feelings have been getting in the way.
I'll admit the focus has been on me-- while that may not sound like the worst thing in the world, it has been extremely uncomfortable, unnerving, but necessary.
One close frend of mine encouraged me a few times to "just be with it." Well, what does that mean? When my adrenaline is pumping, my emotions are doing the driving. Other's have offered "You can do it!" type of feedback. Especially when I had been lamenting over school. Most of the time, I would find relief and comfort in their words, but something was missing.
When this feeling arises, indeed, it's always a choice. You can shift. You can get through the day.
Instead, today, I really chose to be responsible, and in that choice allowed me to embrace it.
I'm incredibly hard on myself-- the past few months, about everything. I laugh as I'm writing this; I mean everything.
Today, with the Grace of God, I've chosen to accept myself-- for all my flaws, for all my gifts, for all that I've created and destroyed, and for the things yet to come.
I had an incredible physical response: my breathing got ligter, the tension in my shoulders released, and I am sure my heart expanded, because I made it smile, again.
How can you have your blog called "Make Your Heart Smile?" when you haven't been smiling. Although this wasn't a conscious thought, I know my feelings have been getting in the way.
I'll admit the focus has been on me-- while that may not sound like the worst thing in the world, it has been extremely uncomfortable, unnerving, but necessary.
One close frend of mine encouraged me a few times to "just be with it." Well, what does that mean? When my adrenaline is pumping, my emotions are doing the driving. Other's have offered "You can do it!" type of feedback. Especially when I had been lamenting over school. Most of the time, I would find relief and comfort in their words, but something was missing.
When this feeling arises, indeed, it's always a choice. You can shift. You can get through the day.
Instead, today, I really chose to be responsible, and in that choice allowed me to embrace it.
I'm incredibly hard on myself-- the past few months, about everything. I laugh as I'm writing this; I mean everything.
Today, with the Grace of God, I've chosen to accept myself-- for all my flaws, for all my gifts, for all that I've created and destroyed, and for the things yet to come.
I had an incredible physical response: my breathing got ligter, the tension in my shoulders released, and I am sure my heart expanded, because I made it smile, again.
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