Today, I Choose.

I usually not a fan of roller-coasters, but I sure do enjoy the ride. (Or at least, now I do) 

The past year and a half has been radically about getting to know myself. After long romantic relationships, challenging family relationships, I chose to move to a location where others accessible but not within close proximity. I was afraid at first, but it has been such a blessing and a gift for me. 

I have moved four times in two years and I am close to moving again, yes, for the fifth time. It may seem that I am crazy, but this won't be my last move. While the process may seem annoying, from my own unique perspective, it is opportunistic for several reasons: 

1. We accumulate a lot of stuff-so I am constantly in a state of reassessing my belongings, my clothes, and also, my relationships. 

2. We are creatures of movement- While it is good to settle down, I used to be so afraid of this idea. I wouldn't even hang anything on the walls. I'd say to the place "I don't know how long I will be here." Now, I say "Thank you, I was here."

3. Embracing change- I used to put my dukes up every time something seemed to change, I protested. It's amazing the amount of resistance I would put up. I've learned to embrace change, and that what I am resisting and the strength of the resistance, will build my character.  Rather then being fearful, I am love. When I chose to embrace it, my life improved immediately. 

These are just three things that I've concluded recently. I am committed to taking action and honestly, I am not sure what is in store for me. I will tell you, my awesome reader(s), that I am up for anything and everything. The possibilities are truly endless for me. 

I got sick and tired of being sick and tired, or of feeling like a fraud. I 'd make jokes about being an accomplished writer, or more specifically, a travel writer. I'd get invigorated by the idea but the thought of taking action, or the amount of work would scare me off.  But, because I MATTER, I enjoy the freedom of adventure,the thrill in the spontaneity of life and the fulfillment of hard work.  I have worked for countless employers, and the idea of working for myself, while it is challenging, it is incredibly rewarding as well. 

I made a commitment over the weekend to BE AUTHENTIC with myself, to BE ON TIME, to LOVE  MYSELF, and share that love with everyone I meet. I didn't take a happy pill. I CHOOSE to be this way, and show up for it everyday. It's been a roller-coaster ride because it is so easy to slip into old habits. I pause, and ask myself, "How will this make me feel later? Who do I need to be for this to happen?" 

What's Next? I am jumping in face first in the flow of life and will find a happy and comfortable place to live, I will find the career I have been longing for, I am committed to being love and deepening my precious relationships, discarding of those that are holding me back so I can have space for the 50 awesome new people I just met. And, hey, you never know, I may discover more awesome things about myself. And whatever isn't so awesome, will be improved.